When I first came across shamanism I was very skeptical.
My spiritual history was as a christian during my teenage years and twenties. I enjoyed the Church of England for the music and the stability of the services. I also attended a baptist church for a while (my brother is a baptist minister). In my late twenties I was very conflicted about my own sexuality which I was being taught was wrong in the eyes of God, by the church. I decided to read the bible from cover to cover to see what it actually said. There are indeed phrases condemning it but also other things that we should do that don’t seem relevant any more. Despite prayer fervently my sexuality didn’t change so I fell away from the church. I became very skeptical about anything related to spirituality.
What I’ve found in shamanism has been very different from what I expected. Firstly others are not telling me what is right or wrong. I don’t think that Shamanism has a particular moral code, it merely respects the one I already had. I have found working with spiritual allies that they respect me for who I am, rather than trying to get me to conform to one way of being or thinking. It is a process of building trust, which is on going.
Working with others experience shamanism and journeying for the first time I have been struck as to how different it is for everyone. Yet shamanism seems to reflect the character of the individual, and how it works for them. So someone who has a very active mind seems to have very active journeys. This is merely a simplistic observation about how the spiritual world seems to meet us where we are, through shamanism.
As I continue on this spiritual path, there has been a deepening of this relationship, which has brought me onto trusting the spirit world. In some respects I have wanted to test the spirits to see if what they say is true. But this feels disrespectful, yet this is what has happened. It wasn’t my intention to test them, but by following insights and feelings, I found what I was being told in the spiritual world, was true in the physical world.
I have never wanted to come across as someone who is away with the fairies but I as find my relationship with the spirit world deepening, I find I am trusting shamanism more and more. This challenges the scientific / rational part of me. I like things to be logical / set and understandable. But more and more I seem to be discovering a world that works very differently. It is much richer in colour and more fulfilling but much more uncertain. I find this a challenging path, yet every step further forward I take in trusting shamanism and my spirit allies, is a positive one.
Keeping this process real and based on results that are visible in the physical reality is the test. I believe that shamanism can deliver those changes. I look forward to the journey of discovery.